Slo down and don’t run everything together, it looks like your in a race. Indian XXX (countrycadillac)«1» 4 comments«1»anonymous readerReport 2013-08-25 20:24:58it was a good story well done :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-04 01:17:19good story pls mke mre :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-03 18:35:38You have a good concept, BUT your thoughts seem to be running over each other, for example ” I closed the door, and thought about Candice walking in.” … Possibly it would have been better as “Because I was worried about Candice walking in, I closed the door.”anonymous readerReport 2013-04-03 15:02:50Don’t quit your day job. 4 comments«1»anonymous readerReport 2013-08-25 20:24:58it was a good story well done :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-04 01:17:19good story pls mke mre :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-03 18:35:38You have a good concept, BUT your thoughts seem to be running over each other, for example ” I closed the door, and thought about Candice walking in.” … 4 comments«1»anonymous readerReport 2013-08-25 20:24:58it was a good story well done :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-04 01:17:19good story pls mke mre :)anonymous readerReport 2013-04-03 18:35:38You have a good concept, BUT your thoughts seem to be running over each other, for example ” I closed the door, and thought about Candice walking in.” … Possibly it would have been better as “Because I was worried about Candice walking in, I closed the door.”anonymous readerReport 2013-04-03 15:02:50Don’t quit your day job.
